{"id":9110,"date":"2020-05-01T06:45:48","date_gmt":"2020-05-01T11:45:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/?p=9110"},"modified":"2020-05-01T06:45:48","modified_gmt":"2020-05-01T11:45:48","slug":"applying-the-work-of-byron-katie-to-the-pandemic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/applying-the-work-of-byron-katie-to-the-pandemic\/","title":{"rendered":"Applying “The Work” of Byron Katie to the Pandemic"},"content":{"rendered":"

Here’s a short post in which I apply “The Work” of Byron Katie to some concrete thoughts that are disturbing me, as per her instructions on this worksheet<\/a>, but also in this 2016 exchange<\/a> in which Katie encourages a woman to say that she’s not afraid of the outcomes of a Trump presidency, but that she actually wants those outcomes.<\/p>\n

Let’s see how this goes…<\/p>\n

______<\/p>\n

The Four Questions, Thought 1: I am afraid of contracting COVID-19 and dying or becoming disabled.<\/h3>\n

Q1. Is it true?<\/p>\n

Yes.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q2. Can I absolutely know that it\u2019s true?<\/p>\n

Because I haven’t contracted COVID-19 and either died or become disabled, I can’t say for absolute sure that these are events that would be ultimately fearful. But this is a manipulative question, because it uses my own intellectual integrity against the feeling. It asks me to dominate my feeling with doubt.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q3. How do I react, what happens, when I believe that thought?<\/p>\n

I experience anxiety, a sense of meaninglessness, but also a sense of urgency with regard to connecting and relationship-building.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q4. Who would I be without that thought?<\/p>\n

A dissociative lump.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Turnaround: “I’m looking forward to contracting COVID-19 so that I can die or be disabled.”<\/strong><\/p>\n

______<\/p>\n

The Four Questions, Thought 2: “I am afraid that if I die I will leave my partner and children vulnerable.”<\/h3>\n

Q1. Is it true?<\/p>\n

Yes.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q2. Can I absolutely know that it\u2019s true?<\/p>\n

Because I haven’t died and can’t absolutely say how my family would respond, it is possible that this fear is irrational. The manipulation and cruelty in this question is that it undermines my reasonable sense of empathy for my family members, while seeking to devalue my perception of my importance to them. The doubt here says: “Don’t trust the instinctual feelings of attachment that have been forged by intimacy and care.”<\/span><\/p>\n

Q3. How do I react, what happens, when I believe that thought?<\/p>\n

I think of my family members in grief and under stress and I feel it throughout my entire being.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q4. Who would I be without that thought?<\/p>\n

A nihilist.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Turnaround: “I want to die so that I will leave my partner and children vulnerable.”<\/strong><\/p>\n

______<\/p>\n

The Four Questions, Thought 3: “I am afraid that the pandemic will destabilize fragile human systems and cause enormous suffering, unequally borne by the poor.”<\/h3>\n

Q1. Is it true?<\/p>\n

Yes.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q2. Can I absolutely know that it\u2019s true?<\/p>\n

Because the epidemiology is still being worked out, not even experts can determine the extent of the suffering to come. The gaslighting nature of this question is carried by it’s black-and-white setup. It’s not like the pandemic will or will not destabilize fragile human systems and cause enormous suffering, but the EXTENT to which it will do just that. In this case, responsible intellectual conservatism is weaponized against me in the attempt to invalidate the feeling.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q3. How do I react, what happens, when I believe that thought?<\/p>\n

I’m filled with impotent rage at the scope of injustice. I feel intense shame at my complicity in systems of oppression. I feel deep survivor’s guilt.<\/span><\/p>\n

Q4. Who would I be without that thought?<\/p>\n

A banal privileged monster.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Turnaround: “I’m looking forward to the pandemic destabilizing fragile human systems and causing enormous suffering, unequally borne by the poor.”<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

____<\/p>\n

If you are a proponent of The Work, please let me know if I got any of this wrong. Thank you!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Here’s a short post in which I apply “The Work” of Byron Katie to some concrete thoughts that are disturbing me, as per her instructions on [\u2026]<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":9111,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"slim_seo":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[21,85,88,86,655],"tags":[521,523],"class_list":["post-9110","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-articles","category-charismatic-abuse","category-cult-dynamics","category-gurus","category-satire","tag-byron-katie","tag-the-work"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9110","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9110"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9110\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9110"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9110"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/matthewremski.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9110"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}